Song and Void Vol​.​1

by Richard McGraw

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1.
Butter Hill 04:20
Glory to God and all of His children. I am among the holiest of them. On Butter Hill She made me feel that nothing else mattered. I loved her breast her face and her laughter. On Butter Hill I must like to fall because that is all all that I do for these local girls. Lord can you help me if I like to fall. There lies my heart the one I surrendered. It felt like gold until it all ended. On Butter Hill Truth is a light that I could not handle. With my can of Hamms I started that ritual. On Butter Hill I must like to fall because that is all all that I do, fall after fall. A beautiful lady a labor to quench me a God with His mercy I must like to fall. So glory to God and all of His soldiers wounded by girl maimed in the suburbs. On Butter Hill
2.
When I’m all alone and all the kids are cool I dream of Natasha in high school. And all of the blood flows to my head filled with all the stupid things I said. I wish she would be mine just one more time. Dreamt of her last night, called her the next day hey Natasha do you know my name? We made out at Seymour’s property when you drank too much of my 40. Then there was the kitchen pantries, panties, flowered lovely for me. She told me bout her life there wasn’t much to say and she’s dating a boy named Beret. And I hear he wears one on his head filled with all the stupid things he says. What about the front lawn bedrooms, assumed suddenly, wonderfully for me? What about the basement closed doors, my wars fought until I was twenty three? And how could it be that you’d give your virginity and I would let you go on account of bad chemistry? So when I lose the wife and all the kids are cool I dream of Natasha in high school. And all of the egos and the ids laugh at all the stupid things I did. I wish she could be mine just one more time.
3.
Find Me Then 04:23
Oh dear Lord I’m losing again. I’m staring at women I’m wondering when all my friends will lend their lovers and start hanging round me again. When my body needs someone when I can’t pretend. Peace, find me then. Oh dear Lord I’m losing again these workplace-made fuckers have worked their way in to my life, I’ve given my freedom. Now what life is left for me? In the love of my country in the hate of it’s men, Peace, find me then. Cause I wandered into a church house when the voices were calling my name. Now I’m down on my knees Yeah but it’s still the same. Oh dear Lord I’m losing again. My body is tired so are these plans. I would like to buy a neck tie for every dream I cannot defend. I’d take them out back and I’d show them their end. Peace, find me then
4.
Look how you failed in the summer of love. Take down the poolside you drew to stay cool. Women are infinite so are my needs. Death is not peace my friend death is not peace. So give thanks to the instincts that have kept you assured that something lies waiting behind those closed doors. Because the doors they are closing and you are lying on the floor. The floor made of tile that will not support all your hope born of body and your faith ill conceived your triumphs your trinity your tradition your creed. Take off your training bra and what do you see? A lifetime of labor and no peace. Death is not peace my friend Death is not peace. So give thanks to your dogmatic tendencies clean. Give thanks to your humble-minded innocence scene. Give thanks to the mother and the father who have trained. I think I see a tunnel I think I hear a train. Death is not peace my friend Death is not peace. Take off those training wheels what do you see? I see a life, I see labor I see no peace.
5.
St. Anthony 02:50
Anthony, if you can hear me I hope that your better now that the worst of things came knocking upon you door. His face was like real estate. Intending to mold your fate he got what he came for. Making out in the 6th grade. You were so ahead of your time. I didn’t make out brother till I was fucking 99. In the gymnasium befriending the big girls, letting the white boys join in the freestyle. Alright alright, goodnight goodnight Alright alright, goodnight Now that you’re number one. Get down on your graveyard knees. Cut loose from this Newburgh scene. Return to the fragrant trees. No animal vacancy. No cheap mediocrity. No evidence in the sky. No eyes to see me cry. Goodnight.
6.
If I have to pray to keep you safe, point to the god tell me his name. If I have to kill to keep you safe, point to the man and I will plan his end. And yes things are simple you can say that to me cause the hole in my heart you can’t see, you can’t see. Because I must sleep, will you lie with me burdened by dreams endless they seem. If I have to die, will you lie with me in my last bed waiting to feel my end. Yes things are simple now to that I’d agree cause the hole in my heart I can’t see and the hole in my heart and the hole in my heart and the hole in my heart I can’t see, I can’t see. Through all these hills of evil wills, hills made of man, man made of fire. We take our turns and if you get burned my heart will spill into the arms that kill. There you will see a man not so different than me with his cause warm like blood worn like a sleeves. And the hole in my heart and the hole in my heart and the hole in my heart you will see.
7.
Jesus told me he loved you. He told me last night in a dream. And I said, I love her too take these degrees away please do. They lead me to sin, la la la la. When notions of freedom weigh in they taunt with the trappings of fame. They whisper in my ear, There’s a great man that’s rarely here. And ain’t that a sin, la la la la. And the things that devils bring make the earth and the sky seem the same. Make some of us more like them. Some of us ought to be like them. Wait too long to be covered in sin, la la la la.
8.
Hopefully 02:21
You’ve been without wonder. You’ve been without mercy. You’ve seen the temple. You gave your reasons fully. You’ve been unsettled at comfortable dinners. You felt the sad heart. You entered the temple fully. Hopefully. There is peace in Victor, good in Jeffery and John was soilder let’s bow before him fully. You loved your mother. You made a living. You cleared the table and tried forgiving fully. Hopefully, hopefully, hopefully.
9.
So you want to be rock star but you’re at home with all your needs in the basement of your mother keeping quite so she can sleep. Of all of the dreams one could choose, there’s one that will place you on display if you lose. Find yourself there long-haired, 45, rockin out the county fair. So you’re just not that clever, well there’s much better things to be. Take what you will from the celler. There’s nothing there worth selling to to the masses and the craftsmen you’ve collected over the years in worship and fear. Fear that you’ll find yourself there long haired, 45 and still rockin out the county fair.
10.
Are you still in love with me? Is there sweetness in your honesty? Remember when we were both crazy and I was willing to travel to be by your side? Maybe we could be lovers without touching each other. When I forget what you look like you tell me you’re in love with me. I used to know what that felt like. Wasn’t that a gift that you gave to me? And how long will it be till that feeling comes back around? And if it’s not found? Maybe we could be lovers without touching each other. Cause you have trained with every loser and I have lost every battle. I once prayed to God for you. Oh the things I do in my misery. I still write these songs for you. Is that all that I’ve got left me? And no I don’t expect much of you yet your always giving me more, a postcard in front of my door. Maybe we could be lovers without touching each other. Cause I forget what you look like and I remember every battle.
11.
Navy Blue 02:06
Your songs, your life your room, your right you’d like to write in simple retreats. She teases you with endless truths, you see yourself in navy blue. The sun, the wind, the park, your coat and your friends are so refined. You see yourself in navy blue. She turns to you and what’s that you say? It’s green, it’s gold it hasn’t been sold it’s worth, it’s worth it’s worth I don’t know. The sun, the wind, the park, my friends and my coat are unrefined How can that be?
12.
The Many 04:14
Are you asleep my little baby? I am miserable like all the many. I have tried their humble comforts they leave me so blind and empty. And in the middle of the night the questions rise aplenty. This is how I’m going to die in a field of daisies. This is how I’m going to die in a bedroom all alone. This is how I’m going to die amongst my friends and family. This is how I’m going to die on my own. I once slept like all the many with my pillow tightly sown. And my supernatural family they would tell me I was wrong. And in the middle of the night I would not feel so alone. This is how I’m going to die in a field of daisies. This is how I’m going to die in a bedroom on my own. This is how I’m going to die amongst my friends and family. This is how I’m going to die on my own. When I left that crooked family I was left in outer space. Staring at my hometown planet without me without a trace. And in that middle of the night I felt a horrible place. This is how I’m going to die in a field of daisies. This is how I’m going to die in a bedroom without God. This is how I’m going to die amongst my friends and family. This is how I’m going to die on my own.
13.
Where Men Go 01:50
SOON YOU’LL SEE WHERE MEN GO. SO FIND YOUR SUIT OF GREY. PLACE IT ON THE BODY BORN WITHOUT A SAY. HOPE WILL RUN. LUCK WILL RUN. SO WHERE THEN WILL YOU STAY. YOU CAN STAY WITH ME THE OLD ENEMY, NOTHING WILL SAY. FEARS YOU’VE TRIED TO FIGHT AND OR HIDE WITH KNIVES LIKE “I DON’T KNOW”. THEY ALIGN SINGLE FILE, WITHOUT DENIAL OF WHERE MEN GO.

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"The record is a true masterpiece..."
-Performing Songwriter Magazine

"We are nearly halfway through 2006, and
Song and Void is the best album to be released."
-antimusic.com

credits

released March 15, 2006

PRODUCER: Zoe B. Zak
RECORDED AND MIXED by Paul Antonell, Clubhouse
MASTERED: Dominick Maita, Airshow Mastering

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Richard McGraw Jacksonville, Florida

A record on Leonard Cohen's kitchen table and one in Lou Reed's hands.

A few loyal devotees have kept this man's art afloat for over 20 years.

"He is an unknown legend in his time."
-Neil Young
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